Addictive Page 3
“I’m sorry about Yvonne. I promise you, she’ll be dealt with.”
I roll my eyes and laugh sarcastically. “How do you expect her to act, Gabriel. I mean, it might as well be stamped on her forehead that you’ve fucked her. The minute I said my name, she turned into an ice queen. As far as she’s concerned, you’re her property and she was letting me know.”
He grabs my hand and squeezes. “I am, in no way, shape, or form, hers. I belong to you, just as you belong to me. She must have overheard me talking about you and she became jealous. I’ve made it perfectly clear to her that what we had was nothing but sex. No strings, no promises. I have no feelings for her whatsoever, and she knows that.”
I can tell he’s trying to appease me, but what he’s saying has the opposite effect. “How can you do that? How can you just have sex with women all over the city when you don’t even care about any of them?”
He releases a loud sigh and sits back in his chair, running his hands through his hair, carelessly. “I can’t explain it without sounding like a dick, Marley. After Camilla, I closed myself off. I didn’t want to feel anything for another woman. Meaningless sex worked for me. I got off; made sure she did as well, and didn’t have to worry about any messy feelings afterwards.” He leans forward again and takes both of my hands this time. “But it was never like that with you. I love you. I would never treat you like one of them.”
Pulling my hands from his, I stand and begin pacing as I try to remember why I’m here in the first place. “Look, I’m sorry I brought it up, it’s none of my business who you sleep with anyway—”
He’s on his feet and in my path instantly, causing me to stop abruptly, or risk slamming into him. “It is your fucking business, Marley,” he grates out. “It’s absolutely your fucking business. Just like what you do is mine. We aren’t done,” he says, waving his hands between us. “No matter how much you want to deny it, no matter how many times you say it, We. Are. Not. Done. I’m not letting that happen.”
Jesus Christ, this woman could test the patience of a fucking saint. I yank my hands through my hair in frustration…again. If things keep going this way, I run the risk of going bald before the month is over. Why did I have to fall in love with a woman that’s so damn difficult?
“Stop! Just stop,” she demands. “I’m not doing this with you again. This isn’t why I came here.”
“Then why are you here, Marley.”
She sucks in a deep breath and narrows her eyes into tiny slits. “You paid for my school.”
Well shit. This isn’t going to be pretty. No sense in denying it now, I was just hoping I’d have a little more time to soften her up before she found out about it.
“I did,” I state matter-of-factly.
“Cancel the check.”
I walk around my desk casually and take a seat, propping my feet up on my desk before answering with one simple word. “No.”
“No?” she asks with a surprised laugh.
“That’s right, no. I won’t cancel the check. You needed the money for school and you work too damn hard. This is my way of contributing to the furthering of your education.”
I keep an impassive expression on my face and watch as her anger slowly starts to bubble over. “Cancel. It.”
“No.”
And with that, she snaps. “You can’t fucking buy me!” she screams in my face, slapping her palms down on my desk and leaning in. Even through my frustration, my body still can’t control its reaction to her. She’s too fucking cute when she’s heated up like this and my cock stands hard and tall in appreciation.
I get to my feet and mimic her stance. “I already have you!” I shout back. “I don’t need to fucking buy something that’s already mine! For Christ’s sake, baby. When will you get it through that stubborn-ass head of yours? Your education is important to you. Therefore, it’s important to me. And I sure as hell won’t sit here and watch you work yourself to death if I’m in the position to make your life easier. End of discussion.”
“You’re an asshole!”
“And you’re being difficult!”
I can’t decide what I want to do more…shake her until she sees reason, or fuck some sense into her. No…scratch that. I choose the latter.
She throws her hands up in frustration and turns for the door. “I’m done. I’m so fucking done,” she mutters to herself as she begins storming away.
My heart plummets at the thought of her leaving. I can’t let her walk away again. Desperation courses through my veins as I practically sprint across the office, slapping my palm against the door to slam it shut just as she pulls it open. Spinning her around quickly, I pin her body against the wooden surface with my own and crush my lips to hers. Devouring her mouth in the way I’ve craved since she left me. I swallow down her surprised gasp, using it as my opportunity to slide my tongue inside and taste her sweetness. A deep groan rises up from my chest the moment my tongue caresses hers. God, I’ve missed her. I’ve missed her body pressed against mine. I’ve missed her taste. I’ve missed the sounds she makes when she’s turned on for me…only me. I’ve missed waking up next to her, being able to hold her, or touch her whenever I want. Fuck, I’ve missed everything.
The moment her body responds to mine, melting into me, I become ravenous. I can’t get close enough to her, no matter how hard I try. Sliding one hand up, I tangle it in her hair, tilting her head at the perfect angle to take our already frenzied kiss to an even deeper level. My other hand slides down her waist, past her hip and outer thigh, until I get to the bend of her knee. I yank it up and wrap her leg around my waist, giving myself more room to grind my aching cock against her core.
Her body jerks and shudders as I circle my hips, knowing exactly what she needs. The whimpers and mewls coming from her just spur me on. Even through all the layers of clothes, I can feel how hot she is for me, and my mind blanks of everything other than burying myself in her warm, wet pussy. Fuck me; I need her.
Breaking the kiss, I trail my lips across her jaw, down her neck, biting and sucking at every spot I know will set her off. I can’t get enough of the noises she makes as she grinds against me, just as desperate for me as I am for her. I release her hair and move my hand between our bodies until I reach the button on her jeans. Everything is a fog as I try to work the button open. I just need to feel her. I need to plunge my fingers deep inside her until she’s screaming my name.
I’m so out of control I don’t register her resistance right away. Her voice sounds like it’s coming from a distance, getting closer each time she says my name.
“Gabriel,” she breathes. “I can’t do this.”
Her hands are on mine, trying to prevent me from getting where I need to be, but her actions are halfhearted at best. She forgets I can read her like no one else. She doesn’t want this to end. Even if that’s what her mind is saying, I know her body is telling me to keep going.
“Please. I can’t do this,” she pleads weakly. I know I’m close. I’m so close to having her that I’m insane with need.
“You want this, my bella,” I say against her lips as my hands fight with hers for access to what’s underneath her perfectly fitting jeans. “Tell me you want my cock, baby. Tell me you need it, and I’ll give it to you.”
“Gabriel,” she moans, grabbing my hair and pulling my face back to her neck.
“You’re mine, Marley. You want this just as badly as I do. I can feel the heat from your pussy. Christ, you’re so fucking hot! Say you’re mine, bella.”
“Gabriel.”
I taste salt as I consume her mouth with brutal kisses. “Say it,” I hiss, rubbing my stiff erection against her even harder. “Please, baby. I need to hear you say it. Please.”
“I can’t.” She shakes her head frantically from side to side. “I can’t. I can’t I can’t I can’t,” she cries as she tries to push me away. Each tear that I watch make a track down her cheek is like a knife to my gut. Seeing her like this physically hurts me. I’d do
anything to take her pain away, to make her smile again…anything, but let her go. That, I can’t do.
Resting my forehead against hers, I gently rub her tears away with my thumb. “Please don’t cry, my bella. I can’t stand it.”
She sniffles and says softly, “I have to go.”
The last thing I want to do is let her leave; but I know her, and she needs time to process everything that’s just happened. She’s getting closer and closer to coming back to me. I can feel it. I just can’t push her any more than I already have today.
I step back on heavy legs and allow her enough space to open the office door. She takes a step to leave, but pauses and turns around. “Please cancel the check,” she asks quietly.
I simply shake my head. “I can’t do that, my bella. Not when I know you need it.”
With a defeated sigh, she turns and walks away, taking my heart with her. I wait until I hear the ding of the elevator, then the sound of the doors closing seconds later. Once I’m certain she’s gone I adjust my throbbing dick to a slightly more comfortable position and walk out of my office into the lobby.
I’ve got shit to take care of, in the form of a secretary.
And she’d do well to be scared.
***
I shove through the doors of Gabriel’s office building as if the hounds of hell are nipping at my heels. I’m so desperate to escape that I don’t pay attention to where I’m stepping. My toe catches on a crack in the sidewalk and I stumble forward, barely catching myself before I tumble to the ground. I think I knew, subconsciously, this would happen when I made the decision to drive over here to see him. I just didn’t take into consideration just how badly I’d feel when I walked away. Denying Gabriel feels like denying a part of myself. I can’t seem to get him out from under my skin. In the short amount of time we’ve known each other, his touch has become second nature to me. Refusing him feels unnatural…just plain wrong. As I stand outside his building trying to catch my breath, my heart physically aches for him. Everything inside me is screaming to turn around and go back to him. To let him hold me and take the hurt away, but I can’t. Especially, because he’s the one who’s put the hurt there in the first place.
“My goodness, sweetheart. Are you all right?” At the sound of the familiar voice, my head shoots up, my gaze meeting those eyes that look so much like his. This is most definitely not what I need right now.
“Mrs. Bertozzi...” I say on a surprised exhale. “H-how are you?”
“It’s Annabel, honey. Please, no need for formality, we’re practically family.”
My heart clenches even more at her words. At this very moment, I want nothing more than to escape. “Right, Annabel. Sorry. I was just…” My voice trails off as I wrack my brain for a believable lie to get me away from Gabriel’s mother.
“Are you okay, my dear? You look like you’re about to be ill.”
The concern on her face and in her voice does nothing to ease the pain I feel. I only met her once and I was instantly fond of her. Seeing her right now is just a reminder that I’m also losing the opportunity at a possible relationship with her.
“I-I’m okay. I just need to…” I point aimlessly toward the parking lot, hoping she understands what I’m getting at.
A knowing expression passes over her face before a pitying smile forms on her lips. “Are you just coming from seeing Gabe?”
All I can do is nod like an idiot.
The sigh she releases speaks volumes. That sigh, coupled with her expression, tells me she’s aware of what’s happened between her son and me. “Have you eaten?”
I give my head a shake in response.
“Why don’t you let me take you out for lunch? My treat. I was going to see if my son wanted to join me, but I’m glad I ran into you instead.”
“Annabel—” I start with another shake of my head, but she cuts me off.
“Please, Marley. I’d just like a few minutes of your time. I know you don’t owe Gabe or me anything, but I’m asking anyway. Will you please let me treat you to lunch? If what I have to say when we’re through doesn’t change how you feel…well, that’s no fault of yours, darling. I’d just like you to hear me out.”
Despite how badly I just want to go home, saying no to Annabel is almost as hard as saying no to Gabriel. And since I’ve already exhausted every ounce of fight I had in me with her son, I cave. Releasing an exhausted sigh, I agree to her request for lunch. The hopefulness in her smile is too much to take and I have to turn away. I hesitantly agree to meet her at a small café about ten minutes from here, immediately turning down her offer of a ride. I’ll give her the time she’s asking for, but I refuse to be stuck without my car, in case what she has to say proves too much to handle. I don’t want to be without an alternative means of escape. I know my limits and I’m already dangerously close to them.
She must sense my determination because she doesn’t push. She makes her way to her car and I make my way to mine. I spend the entire ten minute drive dreading our impending conversation; and wondering how it could possibly affect my feelings for Gabriel. Will it make things worse? Will it make me see him in a different light? These questions run through my mind, driving me crazy, until I pull up to the curb outside the café.
Annabel is already waiting outside the door, clutching her purse tightly in front of her as I step out of my car and up onto the sidewalk. She looks about as uncomfortable as I feel right now. She looks like she’s holding her breath, just waiting for me to bolt without any notice.
She spots me as I walk toward her, and she gives me a sweet smile. God, I really like this woman. Why is everything in my life always so fucked up?
A gentleman coming out holds the door for us to walk through. We wait in silence as the hostess grabs a couple of menus and leads us to a small table against the window overlooking the street. I can feel Annabel’s eyes on me; but I keep mine trained on my menu until the server comes to take our order. Unsure if my already unsettled stomach can handle a heavy meal, I’m forced to settle on a small salad and ice water.
The awkward silence hangs heavily over our table; it’s as if neither of us knows where to start. Finally sensing I won’t be the one to speak first, Annabel dives right in, straight into the deep end.
“He’s a wreck,” is all she says, but it’s enough to make tears well up in my eyes. I open my mouth to speak, not even sure what I’m going to say, but my voice catches on the lump that has formed in my throat. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to upset you—”
“Then why tell me that?” I interrupt, my words breaking as I fight back tears. My anger at being put in this position finally breaks through, and I’m unable to hold it back. “Clearly, you can see I’m just as much a wreck as he is, so why do this, Annabel?”
Her own tears glisten in her eyes and I instantly feel like shit for raising my voice to her. I go to apologize but she speaks first. “I’m sorry,” she tells me as a tear breaks free and slides down her cheek. “You don’t deserve any of this, and I’m so sorry that you’re in pain right now, Marley. But he’s my son, and when he lost Camilla and Robby, he lost himself. I haven’t seen the sweet boy I raised in years. Not until he walked through my front door with you standing at his side.”
“You don’t understand—”
She raises her hand to stop me. “You’re right. I don’t know the exact details of what he did to you, Marley, but I know my son. I know the things he’s done in the past.”
That statement stuns me. She’s truly aware of everything Gabriel has his hands in? Unsure of what she actually knows, I keep my mouth shut. Despite everything, I still feel this need to protect him and his secrets, even if they are the reason for my current broken state.
“Gabe’s dad was…” she pauses and closes her eyes tightly, as though what she’s about to say causes her physical pain. “He was a good husband and a wonderful father. Please understand, I loved my Roberto very much, but he did things…” another pause, this one followed by a
heartbreaking sigh. “He did things I never would have agreed with. But it was how Roberto was raised. It was in his blood and had been instilled in him since childhood.”
The more she talks, the more confused I become. “I’m sorry, Annabel. I don’t understand what you’re trying to say.”
Her eyes dart from side to side to make sure no one is paying attention to us before she leans in closer and whispers, “I think you know what I’m talking about, my dear.”
My breath catches and my eyes widen. “W-what? But…if you knew about that, how could you possibly stay?”
She reaches across the table and takes my hand in hers. “Because I didn’t know, Marley. My husband was very talented at many things. As it turns out, he was also very good at keeping secrets.”
“But…how?”
She leans back in her chair and exhales heavily, as if the weight of the world is on her shoulders. “Gabe was only nineteen when his father died, as I’m sure you already know.” I nod in conformation, silently willing her to continue. “The thing about secrets, darling, is they never stay hidden for long. Roberto had always planned to hand down the company to Gabriel when the time came; it just came much sooner than anyone could have anticipated. When my teenage son was forced into taking control of Bertozzi Enterprises, that’s when I discovered where all the money my husband made really came from.
“You can’t possibly imagine how devastated I was. I learned that my entire marriage, my life, had been one huge lie. I spent years hating Roberto for his lies and for the position he left Gabe in. He’d raised Gabe to know exactly what the company was about and how it stayed so lucrative. He’d been sure to teach our son the importance of keeping this secret from me. For a while, I wished he’d still been alive so I could kill him myself for what he’d done to our child. You don’t understand how confusing,…how destructive it is to love someone with every ounce of yourself, but to hate them at the same time. It consumes you. It’s like you’re being torn in half and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.”